Long Distance Relationships can be a drag for college relationships.
So, you’re graduating from high school. You’ve spent the past four years working your butt off to get into that dream university whose colors and posters have adorned your bedroom walls since you learned of higher education. This should be the happiest time of your life, and yet, there looms a dark cloud, drizzling slightly on your academic parade: the ever-so daunting notion of «the long distance relationship.»
You’ve heard the stories. You had a friend who went to Stanford to play football while his girlfriend studies art history at Brown. Despite the three thousand mile gaping hole, they knew they could make it work. But one of two scenarios inevitably follow: either absence makes the heart grow fonder, or «out of sight» becomes «out of mind». Before long you hear that Johnny and Lisa called it quits after she met a «real man»; a junior theater major in her weekly book club, while he claims that he had it with being «tied down.»
But the number of miles separating two people isn’t the nail in the coffin. It’s not like a couple attending Michigan and Michigan State have it any easier than two people split between Harvard and USC. Love sometimes isn’t enough, but sometimes it is. My parents met in high school and stayed together when my dad went off to Princeton and my mom stayed in Michigan, working and taking some time off from education. Despite a plethora of obstacles, they married, had an exceptional child, and just celebrated their 30 th wedding anniversary. Ultimately, absence made their hearts grow fonder.
Then there’s my story. I was dating a guy for about seven months when I moved from Birmingham, Michigan to Ann Arbor to start the winter term at U of M. Was I in love with him? Maybe. At the time I was happy calling myself his girlfriend and certainly had every intention of remaining so when I made the move. But after a month or so my feelings quickly shifted. Even though only 50 miles separated us, it had a severe affect on him and suddenly the number of text messages and phone calls skyrocketed. I’m the type of girl who enjoys my independence and maintaining my own identity while in a relationship, something often far too compromised, so I felt suffocated by the incessant contact. Take into consideration the full-time course load and extracurricular activities and he began to slip down my list of priorities.
So you’re left with a decision. Do I stay committed to my high school sweetheart as I embark into unknown territory? Do I end things now so we both can feel free to do as we wish in our new environments? Do we take the «let’s see how things go» attitude? There’s no right answer and certainly no universal conclusion when it comes to matters of the heart. But with all the fish in the sea, decide whether the one you’ve got on the hook is the prize-winning Marlin, or if tossing it back might be better the best thing for the both of you.
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